I’m an Aquarian, so this is my birth month! I love birthdays! I thought of taking a birthday off from my night job, but I held my thoughts around it. I might change my mind later… Anywho.. So, I’m supposed to be starting this February with joy and excitement; however, I’m starting this month with I guess grief. Well, I have a lot of reasons for how I feel grief at a moment, but that’s a side story. Long intro long, I took off to lunch from my night job tonight feeling a bit of grief and a little anger in my chest. There, I met a penny handler. So, today I decided to write about that incident. Again I would name it as energy exchange in title since I mentioned about it to him.
Nowadays, when I see a penny hander, I don’t even think twice and I normally say, “I’m sorry but I don’t have cash.” Which was true before since I wasn’t a cash person. However, unfortunately I do a coffee shop marketing. Meaning, I go around coffee shops and post my flyers about my healing. I’m pretty old fashion when it comes to how to develop businesses and how to spread words. Anyway, so I tend to carry around cash so that I can put tips to the tip bins in the coffee shops. Well, you think I can just say that I don’t have cash, so sorry, right? Well…. I happened to be a little bit too honest sometimes, so it’s really hard to tell what is not true for me. Anyway, so I couldn’t say that I didn’t have cash this time.
So, I saw a penny handler when I was coming out of the Trader Joe. I heard this person was asking for a change to someone else outside, and I looked up. Then, I guess this guy noticed that I paid attention to him. So, he approached me. It’s not really cool when a guy approaches me when I was trying to get into the car at night because I happened to be a chick. So, I turned around and said, “what’s up?” Then, he asked me to spare some change. Here is the deal. As I said, I was a little bit emotional when I came out for lunch. I probably wouldn’t have said when it’s my normal self, but for some reason, I couldn’t stop talking to this penny handler. Ok, no worries. I wasn’t pissed off at him or anything. I think I was just emotional enough to say something to this person.
The following was what I spitted out of my mouth. “So, what’s the energy exchange you’re going to give for the spare change I might provide? I don’t think it’s a good idea for anyone to expect people would give you for nothing. I think it’s always good idea to have some sort of energy exchange. What can you provide?” He was startled. I guess no one ever said such thing to him before. He said that he would pay back. I told him that it wouldn’t work since I didn’t think we would ever see each other again. Then, he got really confused. So, I said to him that I probably had a dollar in my wallet, so let me check. As I provided that dollar to him, I told him again that I would give you this today, but for the future, I think it’s really a good idea for you to think about the energy exchange. It’s not fair for you to expect people are going to just give you money just because you’re asking. If you get something, you have to provide something. Then, he took my dollar bill and didn’t even say thank you. He looked very disturbed.
Obviously, I’ve never done such thing before. So, I’m a spiritual healer, right? Honestly, I don’t know if what I said was all right thing or not. Honestly, I wasn’t sure if that’s something I needed to say even. It just came out of my mouth, and I don’t know why it did. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not expecting a penny handler to be a sufficient worker in the split second. I don’t even possess the judgment against penny handlers because I know there are reasons they became as such. I don’t know what the reasons, but everybody’s journey is different. Everybody’s purpose and life lessons are different. So, although I don’t understand why this person is a penny handler at that point, I do accept as is. Still, I was telling him the energy exchange teaching. It puzzles me still. I could see this person has some mental challenge or illness in some sort. I’m sure many of the penny handlers have such.
However, here is my wonder, though. Along the line, this person was able to learn how to make money by asking money from people. So, it’s not that he is starving to death without any tools to earn money. Then, my wonder is if it’s possible to shift the thinking or learning from just gaining money from taking it from strangers, and to maybe doing something for money. It doesn’t have to be selling something, right? It could be carrying some grocery to the car or loading into the car, or anything. It could be whatever the form of energy exchange in his terms. Anyway, I might be just a naïve chick as I tend to be.
What I got after I got into the car, though, is that his thought process and his energy shifted a little bit. I don’t know what it means since I wasn’t interested in reading this person or healing this person. All I know is that he needed to hear what I’ve said at that moment. So, I’ll be ok with what I said.
I don’t know what I want to say by writing about this today. Maybe I want to share that before, I used to have this strange attitude toward penny handlers. I always felt bad when I said no to them. I always felt heart aching when I see some penny handlers. They could be really homeless or they could be just taking advantage of people’s kindness. Whatever their intentions are, it would not be something I can discern because I’m an empath and my heart chakra screws me up on my discernment many times.
Maybe I’m glad what I did today instead of feeling bad about not providing them. I can be as accepting and understanding as possible, but I don’t have to rescue everything in this world. I’m just one person and I can’t save the world. So, I’ll stick with my strong belief of energy exchange in any occasions. Work, social life, friends, family, strangers, my healing work, it doesn’t matter. I’ll stick with the concept of energy exchange because it’s so important for all of us to have the energy flow. It was a random post today, but hope you get well compensated on whatever you do in life! :O)