Aloha Friday! I had a pretty busy week! I don’t know how today holds since my day is never the same throughout the week, so I decided to write a blog while I seem to have some breather this morning! I had a quite an incident through the ebay thing this week, so I’ll write about that. It’s again how energy stays in places and physical matters and how it influences.
As I mentioned before, a part of my clearing the olds to make the space for the new and suitable things to come into my space, I listed stuff on ebay. I sold a few which was amazing and almost amusing at the same time. If someone can utilize what I no longer can, that’s wonderful. I normally take everything to GoodWill since I don’t have much patience when it comes to clearing and cleaning. Even though I was suggested by my healing teacher many times that I should take clothes and shoes to the consignment stores, I always felt that the time and energy to take them to the shop and to wait till being sold were inconvenient. I used to hate wasting time and energy really. Nowadays, I’m learning and shifting a little bit differently, so this ebay thing is a new trial.
This whole experience with selling the items sitting in my room was going really cool until I put the food mixer. When you list one item, during the process, you start to see the other items you need to remove from your space. That’s how my clearing process goes always. At one point, I started to see the food mixer in my vision every time I do something on ebay. This mixer has a little history and I really shouldn’t be having it. It was probably a Christmas gift from my ex-mother-in-law to us when I was married. So, when the mixer kept showing up in my head, I decided to put it on ebay.
Sure, the mixer wasn’t bland new and was used. Sure, it was not shiny beautiful. But, it was a great mixer from a good brand, and I took a good care of it. Since I used to love baking, I kept it for myself even after I split with my ex. As I know for sure, having things which has some personal history is very tricky. If things are from the former marriage or relationship, it’s best to remove it from the space. No matter how you clear the energy, it just doesn’t go that easy because there maybe some intent already sitting in the matter. Then, it draws energy from that person to the item. So, it’s never ending no matter how much you clear the energy of the item.
I’m not here to bitch about my past, but I’ll write this only because it is a great lesson to learn how tricky the energy in the physical matter. So, I’m from Japan, obviously then I’m a Japan born Japanese. My ex was a Caucasian American. We were great together when we lived in Japan. When we moved to the states where he grew up, it was never the same. The more I learn about spirituality and healing, the more I realize how much was not my control and how unaware I was back then. My ex-in-law never liked me from the get go I think. I felt it from the beginning, but as I tend to be a very optimistic and naïve about people, I tried hard to change things so that things would change. I thought something I do wasn’t appropriate culturally. The fact was I was never enough for the ex-in-law. No matter what I did or how I did, it was never ok because I, as a person, was never accepted.
So, my marriage years after I moved to the states were hell. I lost my confidence completely, started to doubt my existence, and started to develop depression, fear, maybe even agoraphobia. But, at the end of the day back then, it was my fault in their view and the circumstance/environment, and it always came back to me as such. When I decided that I could no longer live with myself being such a completely different person than I could remember myself being in Japan, I decided to move out of the environment to collect myself back. It wasn’t because I didn’t like my ex, I loved him. In fact, he might be the only one who showed me what love is.
Ok, so that’s the back ground story. No need to feel bad; that was a century ago. I did lots of work, learned a lot by doing lots of stuff, and now I’m much more expanded person than even when I was in Japan. So, it’s all good. Things happen for reasons even if it’s impossible to think that way at times.
The food mixer was sold really quickly on ebay. I was thrilled. I shipped quickly, made sure it would reach the buyer quickly. It should have been the happy ending and I was able to move on by putting my focus on the new doors. Three days after that, the day the mixer arrived at the buyer, he/she flipped. I found emails from ebay about this buyer filing a return of the item while I never list as “return accepted.” I won’t go through such hustle for my clearing process. I’m not making money through ebay. The second email from ebay stated as paypal dispute filed. I was startled.
The note from the buyer was mortifying. I could feel his/her energy coming into my space and as I wrote a message to this buyer, my hands were shaking. The wording from the buyer were “unforgivable,” “filthy.” It just stubbed my heart straight because I wasn’t prepared for this. I took care of the situation, I sent a message to this person stating that I never listed as new, took photos from every angles, even had an honest description about the item, but apologized for their disappointment which the item didn’t match what they expected (I don’t know what they were expecting).
I refunded the fund but with the condition for them to keep the item because they wrote that they wouldn’t pay for shipping and wanted me to send a shipping label. Geez. Are you kidding? No thanks. I stated that the money should be refunded I’m sure, but if they refused to pay for shipping, then pass the item to someone who could enjoy or give it to Goodwill. The whole purpose of this was to pass it to someone who could utilize it while I shouldn’t be keeping the item any longer since it was from my ex-in-laws.
Anyway, I believe I completed this situation, but it was seriously odd. That night, I was supposed to attend the healing clinic as a healer. I recovered from the incident in a couple of hours by doing many healings on myself, meditating, and working on my abundance. When I spoke to my teacher, she said an interesting thing. What she saw was the buyer was reflecting the energy from the mixer, the in-law’s energy. She (I’ll say she because this is an ex-mother-in-law I had a nightmare days) never accepted me. She never accepted me as my ex’s wife. It was unbelievable for her. I don’t know what she wanted, but for sure she didn’t like that I was Asian or Japanese, either way it doesn’t matter.
So, the mixer had such an intense ex-mother-in-law energy coming through (till this day!!!), the buyer was vibrating in the same way, reflecting the energy coming from the mixer. I was like, are you kidding me? I paid $13.50 flat rate to make sure they would receive fast and get excited about it, then this. Are you serious? Imagine how much this mixer was affecting my life by me keeping this item in the kitchen shelf. Gosh.. Speaking of dumb me… Well, the awareness only goes little at a time. I was too optimistic about how potent my ex-in-law was/is.
The bottom line message I want to tell you is that if you’re keeping stuff from your previous whatever it is, get rid of it. I’m serious. I’m sensitive, so I can’t buy a second hand item, but this is a different story. This is about items which have other people’s intent related to you. So, a wedding ring, jewelry gifts, any gifts from your past, I really really recommend to remove out of your space. Other people using them would be fine because they are more neutral with those energy. They have nothing to do with the energy intent toward you. Though, I do recommend to clear out the energy especially if you’re getting an used item.
Anyway, I’m not here to freak you out, but it’s better to have an awareness than not knowing. I do my work because of my own unique experiences and sensitivity, so if you need a house clearing, give me a buzz. I’d be happy to do the service. House clearing or energy clearing isn’t all about exorcising or dealing with ghosts. It’s about removing energy which isn’t supposed to be there, so you can have space for you completely. It really helps to do it when you’re moving into the space where other people were living. Of course, doing it from time to time does help removing stuff and creating a space for you.
With that, have an amazing Friday and weekend! Joy, love, gratitude and amusement! 😀