Aloha Friday, people! It’s Friday night! Yooo hooo! I was going to write blogs within my business hours, but I have a hot topic today. So, I’d better spell it out! Today has been tough! It’s my learning journey kind of day. It’s all related and the theme comes to one place. So, I shall write about it. The topic is about your focus. Hence, “You are looking at the wrong source!”
I teach two Zumba classes on Fridays as some of you might know: one in the morning and one in the evening. Each is in different gym location. The evening one was one of my original regular classes. The morning one, the long story makes it short, is one of the challenging one. I wasn’t planning to teach two classes per day, but my boss at the time texted me that she no longer could teach so she wanted me to cover until the former instructor comes back. So, in my head, I thought it was semi-short term gig, so I agreed. Ended up, the boss was “quitting,” and that was why she couldn’t teach any more. Ended up, the former instructor doesn’t seem to be coming back to the class (this part is a long story and I’m really tired of this game being involved in the middle of non-of-my-f-ing-business).
From the beginning, this Friday morning Zumba gig has been tough. I thought of dropping out of teaching Zumba probably in large part because of what I had to go through with this one. I mean, I chose to do the Zumba gigs as a side gig so I could enjoy instead of being so serious. My healing practice can get really dark sometimes depending on what people bring in. So, I wasn’t interested in having extra stress in my life as work. Anyway, I thought this location was calming down but it’s stirring up again. I wish I get the message from my Higher Self as “you’re done with this and you can let this go,” but I’m not getting that, either!
This morning, while I was having a serious yucky energy coming into my space, probably because of the healing/reading session booked today, the class was seriously hard. The class size was the smallest since I started to cover this class. That part is fine, but the energy of the class was torturous. No matter what I did to clear up the energy, I struggled. I was not having fun, wasn’t with it, either. It was almost like I was trying to run in the muddy ground.
There is a gentleman in that class who has passionately telling me before that my job was to make people happy and I was to do the service for people to have a good time. The same gentleman today came to tell me something. Obviously he was concerned that my class size was getting smaller. I kept telling him that it was ok because I know that my style is very different from others because I have a different goal. People have preferences, so if they don’t like my style, that’s ok. They have freedom to choose. The gentleman didn’t like my answer and he insisted that it wasn’t ok.
So, I told him clearly that I have a goal. My goal is to create a class which is creative. I want to create a class where people can grow and evolve. I can create the same sort of fitness class people might like because I’m used to taking those classes through the centuries, but my goal is to create a class where people can shift their old way of expectation and evolve. Then, the gentleman said, “I didn’t understand you but now I understood you. You have a strong mind and you want to change people instead of changing yourself.” Well, half way correct. I decided to stick with what I want to create no matter what people give crap out of it; however, I’m not entitled to change people. If people want to change, they can, but I can’t change people. I’m just holding the space where people can evolve and grow. That was the end of conversation.
As much as it sounds I was so certain and confident about stuff, I was already in the rut this morning. This conversation was echoing in my head for a while. I was like, “Am I stubborn?” “Maybe I need to be like a bamboo to be flexible,” such and such. Though, I didn’t have much time to ponder around with this since I had a remote session appointment in a couple of hours. So, I cleaned up myself physically, went back home and started to meditate to clear up my energy, so I could be set for the session.
I won’t get into too much about the session since it’s personal, but the main message I saw was that this readee was looking at the wrong source. Instead of looking for an answer and resources through the Source or Higher Self, this readee was looking for the information from the very wrong source. After the session, as I meditate and clear myself, I fell a sleep (this happens when the energy coming into my space is too much for me to handle at a time…).
When I woke up, I was in bad shape, mainly because the energy coming into my space was so negative and dark. I didn’t want to go to the second Zumba gig. I didn’t want to do this thing any more. I was like, what was the point of doing this feeling like this and going through such hard time? What’s downstream about it? Isn’t this upstream, not just riffles? Anyway, I know I wasn’t for skipping of teaching Zumba in the evening, so I slowly started to meditate in order to clear up my energy.
As I clear up the energy little by little, one layer of my aura at a time, one chakra at a time, I started to feel better. I started to think better. After all, the energy which isn’t mine who is dark and negative has such voice that it’s really hard for me to think like I normally do sometimes. So, when I get like that, I know I have to clear up my energy field, so other’s energy leaves from my space. When I was getting more neutral and positive, optimistic my normal self, I remembered the main message I gave to the readee earlier today. “You’re looking at the wrong source.”
As I set my intent to learn and heal myself when I do readings and healings, I asked myself if this message was applicable for me. Am I looking at the wrong source? What about it? Then, I had a clear picture started to show up. Wrong source, yes. I’m getting wonky and shaky by looking at the wrong source. The wrong source is the people in the class. I’m getting the answer by looking at them. That is the wrong source. I’m trying to shift the energy of the class from the old to new. The majority of the class might not be for the “new.” It might be still the “old” transitioning phase. Remember Naomi, you do your gig, you create your own gig and people who are for it would come. Not to keep the existing to be there. Wrong source… Yes, I got it.
It took me for a while to clear up my energy before I headed down to the evening Zumba gig, but by the time I arrived to the gym, I was pretty much nothing happened today! I had a really fun time teaching the class. The class was having a good time. At the end of the day, I wasn’t tired after teaching the class. That was great!
Another thing was that while I was having a rut time earlier today, I was crying out that I wanted to be appreciated. While I was driving to the evening class, I heard the message saying this, “How about the universe appreciates you? How about the Supreme Being of this universe appreciate you?” When I heard that, I smiled big time. Yes, that’s enough.
I wanted to write about this because if you’re looking for your answers in the wrong source, no matter how you’re doing fine or you’re good, it’s not going to give you any good answers. So, when you’re in rut or are in the bad shape in life, think about if you’re looking at the right source or not.
With that, have an amusing weekend! 🙂